I will move on. I said.
Tomorrow I'll be free.
But I keep hang on to the memories..
Keep it near, never leave..
I know someday I'll let you go..
I know you aren't the one I'm looking for..
But I love you still..
Maybe will always will..
And I believe someday I'll let you go..
But until I can do so..
Let me hang on..
To another tomorrow.
Tuesday
Monday
Piano Player
She stared at the keys over and over again with million melodies inside her head.
She put her hand on them but she did not pressing any.
She let her head plays the melody.
Bcoz her hands, they are broken fingers that can no longer play.
She put her hand on them but she did not pressing any.
She let her head plays the melody.
Bcoz her hands, they are broken fingers that can no longer play.
Sirius Star
Your love is like a Sirius..
Shine brightest in the universe..
Keep shining miles away..
But you are invisible to me..
Way too far beyond the light..
Hiding silently behind the sun..
Send the moon to bright my night..
But it never was you..
Your love is like a Sirius..
Its warmer than the sun..
Bigger than million stars..
But the warm didnt reached me..
Its the love I can never see..
If its too near, I'll get burn..
Coz its too far, you're bleed and hurt..
Poor Sirius keep it hidden..
Gifted with the greatest love that cant be given.
Your love is like a Sirius.
Exist.
But went by unnoticed.
Shine brightest in the universe..
Keep shining miles away..
But you are invisible to me..
Way too far beyond the light..
Hiding silently behind the sun..
Send the moon to bright my night..
But it never was you..
Your love is like a Sirius..
Its warmer than the sun..
Bigger than million stars..
But the warm didnt reached me..
Its the love I can never see..
If its too near, I'll get burn..
Coz its too far, you're bleed and hurt..
Poor Sirius keep it hidden..
Gifted with the greatest love that cant be given.
Your love is like a Sirius.
Exist.
But went by unnoticed.
Wednesday
Random Post
I read a lot, recently. I watched dramas and movies which makes me trapped inside the poor pitiful characters - whoever they are. Mostly second lead of course (they make you have this BIG as hell soft spot in your heart and you wanted to love them instead). Oh, btw you know why its "big as hell" not "big as heaven"? Coz God makes the hell bigger since you know, there are not many good people on earth anyway. Kay, just a random statement.
I dont like it when I am emotionally involved with fictional characters but I cant help it. They indirectly help me to write. I felt as if they convey their feeling to me and said from far "put this feel into words, Nika.. Put it into wordsss..". Kay, overreact. Habis situ.
The thing is, I'm quite different in the world behind this screen. My friends know I write. But they dont know I have this blog. My friends know me as a hyper happy go lucky person but when I read-through my entry, I felt as if I'm an emo loner person. If they found this blog, boleh dibuat bahan 7 keturunan.
There is only two person who really know about this little secret. Of this little place for me to escape. My boyfriend and a sister of mine. Coz I'm very emotional ye'knowww.. Happy person can be sad too. But sad over dramas, my friend will "Chill laa, bukan real pun. Over arr kau". Aiyo ma frenz, its not real but the feelll is real. Me iz zad ye'know. I know sad too ye'knowww..
Sad for all those heart full of love but been rejected and they get hurt. Sad for all those unappreciated love. Sad for forbidden love. Sad things second lead always got laa..
I REALLY need to let them all out.. So yeah, here i am.
Monday
Friend-Zone
We are friends..
You said..
You build a safe ground for me to live..
A prison I can never get through..
You said I'll never get hurt..
But I suffered even more.
You said..
You build a safe ground for me to live..
A prison I can never get through..
You said I'll never get hurt..
But I suffered even more.
You let me love you like a lover..
But you went around like a cheater..
What right do I have to be mad..
What right do I have..
To be mad?
How do I hate a love..
That refused to be love..
But still there, making me smiles?
How do I hate a love..
Who hate to lose me from his side..
Who love me so dear..
In the name of friendship?
How do I undo this love?
Thursday
Your One Sweet Bestfriend
An open letter to a bestfriend who will never read this.
I have a super bestfriend which I love the most. I met her since Semester 1 and thank GOD it still stand strong up until today, though I know she get annoyed with me most of the time now. Coz I loves to disturb her and who am I to fool, I hate you too sometimes, BIJ.
Within this friendship, we both have seen a lot... a variety kind of friends. People comes and go but I'm glad she stay. From ZaiZaii to TooCoolFanClub to TooCoolLoyalMember to Hosmetz to The Mitero's (our current names, I'm not sure its gonna change to what next), its kinda miracle to see this one friend still here. To still be able to cope with my weirdness is a miracle.
We both called each other MOFO and BITCHES (but it doesnt hurt at all. It doesnt sound as an insult when she called me that. In fact, other people start to recognised us as THE MOFOs). She got another name for me now as I wrote this, in November 2016. She called me "MOK (referred to GEMOK since I gained 7kg during sem break). So I called her "NO BUTT" as my way of insulting a skinny tall girl. HER.
This girl, when she get weird, all those typical Malaysian insult will keluar out of nowhere. She's a funny person. A beautifulgrandma lady. One of a kind. On her face is the coolest "Dont Give A Shit" about everything. But actually, she cares a lot. She take good care of you. She's good in PRETENDING she's not fragile at all. You know what, she's the one you should "Handle With Care".
One of the most annoying thing I love to do is to speak English with Chinese or Indian accent. Sometimes she joined me. Sometimes she wish to throw handphone at my face. Well, you wont do that. I'm your MOFO. We love to sing. You can start any songs and within 2 seconds, you will listen someone else sing along. That will be us. Or another way to annoy MY Mofo is when she sang something, you dont sing along, you reply it with sentences.
Ex:
1) "Baby, this is what you came for".
"No, I dont."
2) "Baby you light up my world like nobody else"
"Really? I know"
3) "Do you wanna build a snowman?"
"Where got snow? Where got??"
Her name will constantly change coz I loves to give nickname. From Mofo to Merito to Mitero. Combined them together you got Mofo Merito Mitero. Just recently I came out with new name for her which make her name became Mofo Merito Mitero MeriTOMATO. I dont know where this MeriTOMATO came from.
This November 2016 version of her, she loves cap. She's been asking it around from her boyfriend and her bestfriends and her friends. This one annoying makcik of mine. SMH.
I couldnt afford to buy her present during her birthday coz finance was very tight orh. I'm a student maa. I only gave her a small box of Kitkat with ELS batch which have her favourite colour. I bought it for her long ago just to give it on her birthday. So when I have the money, I decided to buy the cap for her. I bought TWO. Without telling her anything. Without informing her or have the intention to let her know... it was from me. I wanted to make it mysterious.
However, this girl, being hyper-imaginative with weird over-thinking, started to gather bizarre negative thought about the cap. About the sender. I thought I need to do something. Maybe I should just tell her the truth but not just yet. I wanted to wait until the second cap arrived. Unfortunately, being an over-thinker herself, she makes me worried as hell. Its just a cap for God-sake. So at the end of the day, when her over-thinking state is at the climax, I tell her the true and she was dumbfounded. As expected. Bcoz she's been fool all day long. She dont even realised I was texting about her with Aishah when she's actually sitting in between us. Nado saranghae 😆🙆
There will comes a time when I can no longer be there for you. There wont be anyone to scream MERITTTT!!! and when you turns around, I simply said "Saja". Or there wont be anyone to call me Mofo. Or play around weirdly. Or willing to go through hell with me jalan kaki ke PT. Or laughed happily during hardship. Or hate people we hate togeda-geda.
Since we've seen a lot of friendship comes and go, I really wish this friendship last forever. We've seen bestfriends turns stranger. We've seen talam dua muka. We've seen friend with benefit. We've even see friends who dont appear when you need them the most. They all started from friend to bestfriend and when they started to know each other deeper, they grew apart. I hope we dont end up like them. Or other things we dont expect to come.
I dont know what will I missed. So I give them all away. All I ever have for everyone around me. Coz if something are going to happen, I wont regret not doing something I could have done when I had the chance.
You wont read this. But still, I love to leave this piece here as a memory to remember. One of those important people whom I met in my life.
Dear Mofo Merito Mitero MeriTOMATO, you have one of the sweetest bestfriend yet you will never know she wrote this for you. Sleepinghead.
If you read this far in future, I hope I'm still there to be your laughing stock.
Sincerely,
Your One Sweet Bestfriend, Mofo.
I have a super bestfriend which I love the most. I met her since Semester 1 and thank GOD it still stand strong up until today, though I know she get annoyed with me most of the time now. Coz I loves to disturb her and who am I to fool, I hate you too sometimes, BIJ.
Within this friendship, we both have seen a lot... a variety kind of friends. People comes and go but I'm glad she stay. From ZaiZaii to TooCoolFanClub to TooCoolLoyalMember to Hosmetz to The Mitero's (our current names, I'm not sure its gonna change to what next), its kinda miracle to see this one friend still here. To still be able to cope with my weirdness is a miracle.
We both called each other MOFO and BITCHES (but it doesnt hurt at all. It doesnt sound as an insult when she called me that. In fact, other people start to recognised us as THE MOFOs). She got another name for me now as I wrote this, in November 2016. She called me "MOK (referred to GEMOK since I gained 7kg during sem break). So I called her "NO BUTT" as my way of insulting a skinny tall girl. HER.
This girl, when she get weird, all those typical Malaysian insult will keluar out of nowhere. She's a funny person. A beautiful
One of the most annoying thing I love to do is to speak English with Chinese or Indian accent. Sometimes she joined me. Sometimes she wish to throw handphone at my face. Well, you wont do that. I'm your MOFO. We love to sing. You can start any songs and within 2 seconds, you will listen someone else sing along. That will be us. Or another way to annoy MY Mofo is when she sang something, you dont sing along, you reply it with sentences.
Ex:
1) "Baby, this is what you came for".
"No, I dont."
2) "Baby you light up my world like nobody else"
"Really? I know"
3) "Do you wanna build a snowman?"
"Where got snow? Where got??"
Her name will constantly change coz I loves to give nickname. From Mofo to Merito to Mitero. Combined them together you got Mofo Merito Mitero. Just recently I came out with new name for her which make her name became Mofo Merito Mitero MeriTOMATO. I dont know where this MeriTOMATO came from.
This November 2016 version of her, she loves cap. She's been asking it around from her boyfriend and her bestfriends and her friends. This one annoying makcik of mine. SMH.
I couldnt afford to buy her present during her birthday coz finance was very tight orh. I'm a student maa. I only gave her a small box of Kitkat with ELS batch which have her favourite colour. I bought it for her long ago just to give it on her birthday. So when I have the money, I decided to buy the cap for her. I bought TWO. Without telling her anything. Without informing her or have the intention to let her know... it was from me. I wanted to make it mysterious.
However, this girl, being hyper-imaginative with weird over-thinking, started to gather bizarre negative thought about the cap. About the sender. I thought I need to do something. Maybe I should just tell her the truth but not just yet. I wanted to wait until the second cap arrived. Unfortunately, being an over-thinker herself, she makes me worried as hell. Its just a cap for God-sake. So at the end of the day, when her over-thinking state is at the climax, I tell her the true and she was dumbfounded. As expected. Bcoz she's been fool all day long. She dont even realised I was texting about her with Aishah when she's actually sitting in between us. Nado saranghae 😆🙆
There will comes a time when I can no longer be there for you. There wont be anyone to scream MERITTTT!!! and when you turns around, I simply said "Saja". Or there wont be anyone to call me Mofo. Or play around weirdly. Or willing to go through hell with me jalan kaki ke PT. Or laughed happily during hardship. Or hate people we hate togeda-geda.
Since we've seen a lot of friendship comes and go, I really wish this friendship last forever. We've seen bestfriends turns stranger. We've seen talam dua muka. We've seen friend with benefit. We've even see friends who dont appear when you need them the most. They all started from friend to bestfriend and when they started to know each other deeper, they grew apart. I hope we dont end up like them. Or other things we dont expect to come.
I dont know what will I missed. So I give them all away. All I ever have for everyone around me. Coz if something are going to happen, I wont regret not doing something I could have done when I had the chance.
You wont read this. But still, I love to leave this piece here as a memory to remember. One of those important people whom I met in my life.
Dear Mofo Merito Mitero MeriTOMATO, you have one of the sweetest bestfriend yet you will never know she wrote this for you. Sleepinghead.
If you read this far in future, I hope I'm still there to be your laughing stock.
Sincerely,
Your One Sweet Bestfriend, Mofo.
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